Thursday, July 16, 2009

Longing for the Days of Old...

Does anyone else ever, sometimes, long for the "good ol' days"? I'm finding myself frustrated at times over today's society and expectations (or, maybe, lack thereof).

What happened to a good face to face talk? Picking up the phone and calling someone to see how they are, rather than texting "what up dawg..." or something else equally appalling? Do you think "Generation Text" will ever know what it is to have a "real" conversation with someone? Do 5th graders really need cell phones? Will our children spend their time communicating via text with people in the same room? I'm not "anti" technology...more "moderate" tech...just think of the ease young adults now have with dating and Facebook or MySpace to help them out. No facing the rejection up front...just via a computer screen (good? bad? otherwise? Not sure!!)

How I wish for the days when children could play outside from dawn to dusk with the neighbor kids, only being called in for supper (which was met with groans and objections). No worries about child abductors, obese children, too much TV. We live on a secluded 8 acres...our children thrive in the safety of our property and the fact that they can play outside (unfortunately {or maybe not} without neighbor kids) for hours on end, using their imaginations and muscles!

Remember when everyone knew their neighbors by name. If you saw a someone else's child doing something that you knew their mother would disapprove of, you would correct them and you would hope that that mother would do likewise with your child.

Seems like parents today want to be friends more than parents to their children. I'm all for instilling a bit of fear and a healthy dose of respect in my kids. Not fear, as in, "oh my gosh, she's gonna beat me" but fear as in "oh, no...I just got the look"...and to think that the look was all it would take sometimes to know you were in deep doo. I know many parents are "anti-spanking"...we are not those parents. If the deed deserves it, our child will get a spanking...spanks are reserved for those things too naughty for a time out, or repetitive disobeying (when, obviously, the time outs aren't working). I've noticed, that the more children we've had, the less, actually, we find ourselves spanking. I think they learn from each other's actions!

And how 'bout accountability? Making our children be accountable for their actions? Forgot your homework? Bummer, guess you'll have to lose a few points and learn a lesson. Not the best player on the team? Hmmm...perhaps we need to practice more rather than have mom or dad demand you get a starting position on the team. Grrrr...this one really irks me...let your child earn his place in life, support them, encourage them, teach them...but for Heaven's sake, don't demand it.

I love being a parent. My family is my passion, my joy, my livelihood. I can only pray that I am doing what I think is best for our children, our family, our marriage. While I may not be totally in sync with some of society, and maybe (hopefully?) I'm a little old fashioned, in the end, I believe my kiddos will benefit from the boundaries, guidelines, and lifestyle we provide for them!

And if not? Well, guess they can blame me in their therapy...

5 comments:

  1. Wonderful post. I'm not a parent yet, but I agree with everything you wrote. My Dad and I were just having a conversation about this exact topic the other day. It's sad how disconnected people have become from one another... I didn't have a cell phone until 16 and I wouldn't trade any of it! And I didn't have one at allll during my college years. I liked that I had to find more creative and personal ways to interact with people... home phones, popping over to an apartment/dorm for an unexpected visit, running into people, etc... It was lovely. :)

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  2. I sooo miss those days! These kids do not know how to have a conversation with someone, and when they do it's disrespect!

    These kids don't know what it's like to play outside. God forbid they don't get to play video games all day!

    The bad things happened just as much when we were kids, but we just didn't pay attention to it because we were the kids. We did still play outside all day though.

    You catch a kid doing something wrong now, and they will stare you down and flip you off! We would of never done that! We knew we would get our butts spanked!

    Oh, I could go on forever about this!

    Great post.

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  3. Amen, girl!! My 7 year old is BEGGING for a cell phone...ummmmm...maybe when your 20!!! And then you can buy your own!!

    Have you seen the news article (I swear, this is a true story!!!) about the mom who is suing an Egyptian resort because she believes her daughter was impregnated by swimming in their pool (which was, of course, *insert sarcasm* contaminated with rogue bodily fluids). First of all....IDIOT!!! Secondly, you are doing your child a disservice by not requiring her to be accountable for HER actions.

    I don't know what has happened to this world.

    *Sigh*

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  4. I just LOVE this post because I agree with it. I wish we could live in those days now. Pure innocent neighborly fun!
    Wendy

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  5. Going back to the good old days sounds romantic But, they were frought with their own set of problems. Technology and the youth subculture are so embedded in our society that as parents, we need to use it to our children's advantage. I believe we can integrate good old values, attitudes,and behaviors that were so important to our parents, with the benefits of present day technology raise the most well adjusted, well informed generation ever.
    -Dr. Michael Osit/Author/Generation Text:Raising Well Adjusted Kids In An Age Of Instant Everything

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I love comments! And, I welcome your thoughts that aren't in agreement with mine...as long as they are respectful!

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